Honey Buziness
I met a yellow and black insect who made the best honey ever but didn’t like to talk about it. He was a humble bee.
Movie Plots
The Shining: A family’s first Airbnb experience goes very wrong. The Lord of the Rings: Group spends nine hours returning jewelry. Titanic: Everyone tries the ice-bucket challenge. Beauty and the Beast: Stockholm syndrome works. The Chronicles of Narnia: Kid comes out of the closet. From the Twitter feed #ExplainAFilmPlotBadly
Work It Out
Jokes about unemployment just don’t work.
Thumbs Up
Learn sign language, it’s pretty handy.
A Bad Date
I got fired from the calendar factory for taking a day off. I thought my days were numbered. I stole one once too and got 12 months.
When I Were a Lad
Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.
Cheesy Pun
After the explosion at the French cheese factory there was de-brie everywhere. Better tread Caerphilly.
You Can Steal This Pun
I have kleptomania. When it gets bad, I take something for it.
On a High
Try inhaling helium, people speak really highly of it.
Bean There
Slipped on some beans yesterday. If only I’d had the benefit of Heinz sight.